Let’s start with two more weird ideas people have about the United States.
- That everyone is burned after they are dead and there are no burials
- That the United States is a country in Europe.
Okay so the week started of pretty normal, I believe. We worked hard. There is this one family we teach where we were there almost every day this week because every morning they would call us to make sure we would come over.
Then in the middle of the week I got out of Adidogome and went into the middle of Lome in the sector of Elder Wride for the day. He is a super cool guy and we had some great lessons and talked a lot about our different experiences in this half dream half nightmare we call the Benin, Cotonou Mission. However, we are both a lot happier then we were in the beginning. Their apartment was super weird, every room was crawling with cockroaches, like little baby ones. Sorry for the image mom, but it was bad, like you can’t take a step without killing a few. Luckily I didn’t eat any by accident.
Then the highlight of the week happened the last few days. On Saturday I got to witness with my own two eyes how the Togolese do "la dote" in English that is the dowry. Basically it’s a big ceremony where a husband buys his wife from her parents. It’s all over Africa and it’s embedded in tradition. For purposes of religion its pretty screwed up actually, because what it is if a guy wants to marry a girl before he can do that he has to pay for her. But with a butt crap ton of money and so many people can’t pay so they end up living together without getting married and then bunches of kids are born and parents leave. It’s sad stuff. It brings lots of pain and suffering. However, you can’t change the culture so I went to go see one of the members of our branch buy another member of our branch for the price of about 1000 US dollars. When I did the conversion it doesn’t look like that much but this is Togo, one of the poorest countries in the world. Also one of the cheapest dowry’s in Africa and trust me that is a ton of money here.
Any way the ceremony was super interesting. The wife’s family is on one side and the husbands on the other. The couple is nowhere to be seen for most of it. It was done in the mother language of the couple, so of course I understood absolutely nothing. There is a lot of discussing, lots of whispering, then the husband’s family brings in the offerings. Expensive alcoholic drinks, food, pine, other gifts and a sum of money. Then the family of the wife goes and checks it out to see if it is worthy. If they say “no” the dowry is over, but they accepted. Then there was some more stuff that happened I don’t know but people were laughing a lot. Then a big lady came around to the husband’s side to get money to pay for "the transportation" of the wife. Then someone walks into a room with someone covered in a sheet they bring it, uncover her, and it’s not the bride. They repeat the same process many times trying to get more and more transportation money. I see money is everything here. They finally bring in the girl. Then they talk and then she goes and changes into clothes that match the guy and then the guy won the game he got the girl. Now they can go pay a butt load of money to the state at the town hall to get really married. I’m super angry I took so many pics of the ceremony but the camera battery died and we didn’t get pic with the couple.
On Saturday we also got calls for transfers. Thank everything that is good in the world I’m staying with my son for the next six weeks. They are adding two new missionaries into our apartment so I’m now a district leader to an elder from Haiti who is training a brand new American. I’m super excited to work with these guys were going to be a force to be reckoned with.
When me and Elder Kouadio started together we had two sectors to work in. We had only two investigators. Everything we have now is thanks to the work we have done and the help from the Lord. We worked really hard and brought these two sectors, that were both dead, back to life. However, when we got the call that two new missionaries were coming into the sector me and my son had a really hard time thinking that we would have to leave half of our investigators that we love so much. We prayed about it and came to a good decision about which sector we will take, but it was still hard. And I know for a fact people will take it hard that me and my son won’t get to teach them anymore. We are a good team and people really seem to like us.
On the way home from church a lady invited us into her home to teach her the gospel before we started the lesson she asked if we were thirsty. We actually were so she went to go get something to drink she comes back with a beer. I say oh actually, no thanks on the beer we thought you were going to bring water we don’t drink beer. You would think that would be the end of the conversation. I have never been pushed so hard to drink in my life, she is like what are you scared? It’s only got a little alcohol, you drink the whole bottle you won’t even get drunk. It’s nothing, just at least taste a little. Every line that gets people to drink she used. She was very pushy, me and my son just kept saying no and that it was against our principles and she finally let it go and we had a great lesson, it was just really weird.
This next week the rumors of the biggest protests and riots are coming so I’m actually kind of scared. I hope it all works out.
Splits with Elder Wride
Kouadio falls asleep while exercising
Eating Fishy Crackers - taste from home
La Dote Ceremony
